on my mind

I've been thinking about something a lot the past few days & feel like I need to get it out of my head.

As I've mentioned a time or two lately, I would love for us to have another baby soon. However, I feel like I'm holding back doing some of the things that could help it happen sooner. {I'm not talking about THAT, though that's a whole other story. I'll spare y'all {namely my family} the details. You're welcome.}

Anyway. I think I've come to the realization recently that I'm scared* to really try for another baby. {* I don't like using the word "scared" because it makes it sound like I don't trust God to take care of me & us. That's not the case at all, but I can't think of another word to use.} When we were trying to get pregnant with Jonathan, I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome {PCOS} and that can cause fertility problems. We tried for 3 years before we got pregnant with him and that was a very hard time for me.

I don't think I even realized until just recently how hard it was on me. That's one of the things I'm scared* of. The month after month wondering & hoping. I always felt like I kept everything in perspective pretty well. I completely understand that we can only do so much, and after that it's in God's hands. Though I understood that, I eventually got to a point where I was consumed by the whole process. I'll be honest I'm worried* {again, not a word I like to use} that we'll struggle again.

Another thing I've been thinking a lot about lately is the losses we suffered. We have three babies waiting for us in Heaven. It was so hard before, and I can't even imagine how hard it would be now, knowing what it's like to have a child. Again, I know God is in control, and would still be my Comforter if we did experience another loss, but it's obviously not something I want to happen.

So, I think some of this may be why I'm having a hard time doing some of the things I should. My doctor put me back on Metformin {for the PCOS} several months ago and I rarely take it like I'm supposed to. I know that losing weight would help tremendously and, well, yeah. That's a whole other story too.

I know this turned out to be kind of a rambling {possibly making no sense} post, but I just felt like I needed to get it out of my head for a while.

If you stuck around for the whole thing... thanks.

hello handsome

Show Us Your Life: Your Kid’s (or Future Kids) Names

Kelly’s Korner is one of my favorite blogs. She’s a wonderful Christian lady who has one of the cutest babies ever. Each week she hosts “Show Us Your Life” where bloggers post on the same subject & she puts up a list. It’s a great way to get ideas for all kinds of things.

This week’s topic is kid’s names. How did you come up with yours & what (if any) do you hope/plan to use in the future.

For someone who’s not currently pregnant, I think about baby names an insane amount. I can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve had with Lisa and my mom about the subject. We often call each other with suggestions and spend a lot of time discussing the advantages/disadvantages of each name.

I’ll be the first to admit that I have a lot of “requirements” for names. Our last name is very short & blunt, so I have a hard time finding names I think sound good with it.

Some of my “rules” are:

* the first name should be {at least} three syllables
* the middle names should be {at least} two syllables
* no short “a” sound
* preferably doesn’t start with an “a” or “m”
* preferably doesn’t end with an “n”
* has a good meaning

Yes, I know that’s crazy. It drives my mom nuts. LOL

Anyway…. on to the names.

Boy name: Jonathan David
I honestly don’t remember how we originally came up with the name Jonathan. I think it had something to do with the Jonathan in the Bible. He was David’s best friend & very loyal. Jonathan means “God has given”, and that’s certainly true of our little man. The middle name, David, was easy to choose. It’s Chris’ middle name as well as his father’s.

Here are a few of the names I’ve been tossing around lately:

Boy:
Jeremy
Jeffrey
Timothy

Girl:
Elizabeth
Olivia

As for middle names, I’m not sure. My dad would LOVE, love, love for us to use Porter {my maiden name} as the middle name, but I haven’t made up my mind yet.

So… play along! What names have you used or hope to use? How did you decide on them?

Maybe I’ll get some more to add to my list. ;D

random stuff

Just a few random things floating around my head right now:

* I was really enjoying American Idol at the beginning of the season, but now, not so much. I still record it each week though & fast forward through all the talking & just watch the singing. Crystal is by far my favorite.

* Jboy’s last day of school is 2 weeks from today and I can’t believe it. Where did this year go?

* Speaking of school, we have loved having him in preschool this year. He’s learned so much and we’ve both made some great new friends.

* We recently subscribed to Netflix and have been thoroughly enjoying the Instant Queue function. Thanks to this we have been able to watch several {horrible} movies we never would have seen. LOL

* Also, thanks to Netflix, we’ve started watching Dexter. I had heard so much about this show & was very interested in watching it. It’s so good! There are so many suspenseful moments & totally laugh out loud moments. Love it!

* I’ve been toying with the idea of taking an internet break for a few days. I’m ashamed to admit how hard it is for me to think about doing this. I’m on the computer way too much, and I know it’s hindering me getting much anything done around the house.

* We would love to give Jonathan a sibling soon. He goes back & forth as to whether he wants a baby brother or sister. Lately he’s been saying he wants a baby brother AND sister! Uh, no. I’m blaming this on a recent episode of Dora where her mom had twins.

* Sadly, I think my love for Grey’s Anatomy has waned. I have like 5 episodes on the DVR and have no desire to watch them. I’ve though about just deleting them, but I can’t seem to bring myself to do it.

trying something

I wanted to try something I saw on Pioneer Woman's Photography page...

Hold your mouse over the picture & see what happens:



Pretty cool, huh!

I forgot to mail a card...

but I have a feeling these will make up for it. ;D





Happy Birthday, Mom! We love you very much!

teacher appreciation gift

As I said yesterday, it's Teacher Appreciation Week at Jboy's school. Tomorrow Today's gift is a snack/drink basket filled with each teacher's favorites. I did some searching online, and found a super cute idea... altered Sonic drink carriers! How cute is that?! Originally I was just going to print the design she used but, sadly, our printer is out of ink. So, I just used some scrapbooking paper & leftover Easter basket filler. I got lucky in that the filler & the paper I wanted to use actually matched!



I think it turned out really cute & I'll definitely be keeping this idea in mind for future gifts.